Without a Mother

I see her when I look in the mirror….even though she’s no longer here.


I never really realized the resemblance until she was gone.

When I was growing up, I believed all moms were beautiful like mine.  She was pretty in a natural kind of way.  Most of the time, she was “house” mom.  She didn’t spend her day all dressed up.  But when she did….I was in awe at her beauty.

Its been 10 months since I spoke to my mother…..since I held her hand. She was still beautiful to me, even her broken and decrepit earthly body. I could still see her, my mother.


I don’t know how to feel. I’m now a member of a very large club, one of the dead and gone mother’s club. I don’t want to be sad but days like Mothers Day…..are a jolt to the human heart. The kind that whispers of memories gone by and erases unkindness from the files. I choose to be a mother that leaves a legacy, but no one can hide mistakes made or words spoken…only God can do that.

I am so grateful He gave me that at the end with my mother.

I can’t wait to do something in her honor this weekend. She and I talked often about foods we both loved. Pea salad was a delicacy to us both, hers….was THE BEST ever. I plan to make a dish of it just because it will be something I know she would ooh & ahh over. It’s my way of having her here, in my heart!

Happy heavenly mothers day, Mom!

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