Big Day Sabotage

mad girl

After mentioning my NOT FINISHED SHOPPING dilemna yesterday….I thought about Christmases past and how "letdown syndrome" has always plagued my family through one member or another. 

Even me.

If I were to ask…..many of you could most likely share a memory of someone being disappointed or totally losing it over the big day festivities in your own family. 

Holiday's can be a ton of pressure for everyone. 

For parents, the stress of providing just the right gifts (affording the really special ones) and making sure the numbers all match up amongst all the little darlin's is almost enough to drive even the strongest of mama's & daddy's to take a hike far far away during the holiday's.

It's real, man.  The pressure is real.

Today I read a post on the awesome Jen Hatmaker's blog about her own experience with Christmas sabotage…..from the angle of her adopted kids.  Her explaination of their brokenness got me thinking of just what causes our meltdowns when gifts, activities or special events don't go our way (or the way we have envisioned in our heads).

1.  Unrealistic expectations

Admit it, you've asked or dreamt of something so outlandish that even you thought…."That's a crazy request!".   While it's probably okay to wish for big wowzer gifts it's not okay for the ultimatum of having it or nothing at all.  That puts pressure that is completely unfair on the giver and sets you up for a disastrous let down.  Don't set your dreams so high, people.  It's a gift, remember?

2.  Entitlement

The land of "I deserve" is all around us.  I remember a friend of one of my kids who expected amazing gifts on every special occasion.  The family members all jumped in line to give this kid all the great expensive items on their list.  It was for no other reason than they, along with this kid, believed it was deserved.  None of us are entitled to gifts, not even on special holidays.  Gifts are just that….A GIFT!  You're welcome!

3.  The world tricks us

Television, Big Box stores, magazines….other people all play a part in hyping up our dreams for the best of everything.  Just click onto Pinterest and you'll see beautifully decorated houses, fancy wrapped items, perfect menus and all of it nearly unattainable for the busy working family/mama to accomplish.  Yet, the pressure to perform at that level and to make everyone's best wishes come true are everywhere.  We fall for it and end up feeling depressed when our big day is normal.  Don't be tricked!

So, how can we all enjoy our holidays and all that goes along with them?  By being more aware of our expectations and understanding the triggers that push us to feeling unsatisfied.  It may not completely stop us from feeling let down but it will help us to put what's most important into perspective.

wish list

A big long list of wishes…..seems silly when you focus on the real meaning of Christmas, doesn't it?  So before you go and sabotage your whole Christmas remember, we're not celebrating YOU.  We are celebrating JESUS!

jesus is the reason

 

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