I hate change! I admit it. There’s nothing scarier or more disconcerting than totally shaking up your life and letting the chips fall wherever! That’s just hard! Thinking of all the change I’ve experienced this last year makes my knees wobbly.
Yet, here I am. All changed up and heading for even more in the next few months.
I ran across some photos of me from “before all heck broke loose” that stopped me in my tracks. I look completely different. In defense of all the unemployment garbage, more stuff happened to me all in and around the same time frame.
— I turned 50, then 51.
— I started menopause.
— I was battling a painful disease that was undiagnosed.
— I had 2 daughters get engaged and 1 actually get married with a real wedding.
— My boy joined the Army, then left for Basic and then to AIT training.
— I finally got diagnosed with Rheumatoid Arthritis.
— I snipped some mama strings as one of my girls moved a thousand miles away for a job.
— I started my forever life on the drugs that would help fight the progression of my disease.
— I aged, fell apart and really started to look like an old hag.
Who am I?
I’m 51 so I realize that beauty is fleeting. All that youth stuff fades and in order to be alive we all have to just keep going & living. The changes that take place physically are all part of that process. But, add in other sources that attack and mess up your metabolism, destroy your hair & skin and age your mind and what you end up with is big change.
I’ve beat myself up too much through this changing process. Why can’t you just take better care of yourself? Doing that only makes me feel worse. I love how God reminds me that I am able to pull up my own pants again thanks to that awful medicine! So, losing your hair…ain’t so bad!
If you think change is hard…. call me.
Look, all I know is that when you think change is going to kill you dead….keep going.
God
will
use
change
to
change
you
and
me
I don’t want to stay the same. I wanna be better. I wanna be stronger. I wanna be more like HIM. I wanna be exactly who HE designed me to be. Even if I look older, chubbier….haggier!
God,
Thank you that you don’t leave me {as is} but that you change me! You know me better than anyone and you love me even more. I am grateful for every hard thing! All of it sends me right back to you, which is right where I belong!
Amen