You’re A Pain

Not you.  I love you.  I can't think of one rotten reason not to love you.  You come here and linger around reading my words.  Sometimes you leave me comments and tell me what they mean to you and it makes my heart go all a flutter.  You, make me enjoy doing what I do here.  

I'm talking to the beast that lives within me.  The one who rears its ugly head when I get just the slightest bit weak.  The one that for the most part I CAN MANAGE with my ninja girl superpowers — rest!  I'm not fooling anybody with that tactic.  Fibromyalgia isn't one to be "managed" unless you count having NO STRESS, NO EXHAUSTION & NO WORRY for a regular lifestyle.

Tell me, who do you know that doesn't have any of those issues going on in their life.  Uhh, yea…no one.

This whole week has been one big Fibro attack.  By Thursday, I was pretty much moving from one sitting position at work to another.  Which isn't quite do-able in my job.  I spend an enormous amount of time on my feet and walking long hallways all day.  Hello, 2 lunch duties?  Standing and walking are sort of important.

Guiltily, I decided to take Friday off and rest up.  Why does feeling well have to cost so much?  This illness is an embarrassment.  It makes you look like a sissy or a fake.   I'm neither of those.  I often wonder if having this beast is God's way of making me slow down (not that He's punishing me).  Is there something He wants to show me that I'm not willing to see otherwise?  I'm not going to argue with God about how crummy I feel — He knows.  He sees.  What I am going to do is  L I S T E N for His voice and His nudging in my life and let this attack run its course.  It's all I can do.

What threatens to invade your life and make it miserable?  Don't let it win, friend.  You are too strong for that!


I can't question you as to WHY ME when it comes to this Fibromyalgia pain.  I trust you too much to do that.  Help me do what is right for me to feel relief and for my family in coping with my bad days.  I consider it all joy, Lord that you trust me enough to handle such a thing.  I never take my good days for granted.  I know I am blessed with the body you've given me.


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