Tuesday Disguised As a Monday

I’m full-on immersed in a misery that is of my own making (as usual) and maybe, just maybe….that’s the PMS talking because I am no longer ON EDGE, I AM OVER THE EDGE! Never mind jumping. That would be relief! I think I’ll just wallow here in my crazy and see if it all works out.

Hey, I am optimistic…right?

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It all started when I slept in this morning to the very late hour of 8:46 am. Who does that? I woke up, feeling as if it were at least 5:15am. I forced myself out of bed since – hello?…half of The Today show was over and I hadn’t even swigged down any coffee. Then, as if sleeping all day wasn’t enough… my hubby just walked out the door and didn’t even say, “Bye Lazy!”

What happened? Did he not even see me staggering around trying to wake up and say GOODBYE?

I didn’t even look in the mirror, just walked straight downstairs and let the dog out (who just looked at me and wouldn’t go to the bathroom). This part is very important because the rest of my day has been devoted to dog and all the dog problems a girl who doesn’t clean up puke or poop could have. Which brings me to a conversation that I DID HAVE with my hubby last night – he WOULD NOT be coming home until very late tonight.

Right. Long day. No way to be here to rescue me from every disgusting puke pile and looser-than-the-law should allow bowel movement made by our beloved Miss Lizzy.

Next I went up to make the bed, the one I had leisurely laid in all morning. I shook out the covers, straightened up all the sheets and pulled the last of the bedspread into place when I saw it….DOG PUKE!!! On my pink bed covers! I don’t wash this huge thing very often because it is gigantic and takes forever to dry but I had JUST DONE IT!!!


I went out to the garage and couldn’t figure out why it smelled so horrible until I realized that a bag of fresh stinky garbage had fallen over and some of its contents fallen on the floor! I don’t want to be all dramatic (oh, yes I do) but I had to move boxes of junk off the top of the garbage cans to put the smelly bag in and more stuff fell all over the garage. It was here that I started to pick up on a trend for myself on this the Lords day of 2015!!

So, I went back inside because, what else? Until I realized that there were many glistening spots on the living room rug. Some were great big, others were dots but all of it was either throw up or liquid poop! I fell back on my knees and started scrubbing all the spots of horror and I THANKED GOD FOR GIVING ME A MAN WHO HAS A JOB!!! But also, for a man who would clean all of it up for me if he were only home to do it.

After that, I ate a hotdog and a handful of M&M’s almond eggs because that’s how I cope, people!

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Just being real. What’s going on in your world? Hope your Tuesday is going much better than my Tuesday pretending to be a Monday.

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