Posts Tagged ‘gender neutral parenting’

We’re Different

Wednesday, April 2nd, 2014

Thank goodness, we're all different.  I'm me, you're you and that's a good thing.  I thought I was hearing "things" this morning when the topic of gender neutral parenting was brought up on a talk show.

It's a real thing!?!  What?!

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Recently, I subbed in an all boys choir class.  Freshman boys.  There's something fun about boys in general.  But an all boys choir….really fun.  The first thing I noticed as they arrived in class was all the noise.  Boys are unique in their abilities to make noises.  Each of them, in their own special way…buzzing, growling, singing and just making the room alive with their boy antics.  I immediately thought back to my own boy and the many sounds he made all throughout the day.  Boys are inclined to put a noise to every toy they play with.  A Tonka truck, growls and vrooms.  Space ships, zipping and zinging.  Cowboys & indians, shooting and falling over.  Fast cars, screeching tires and roaring engine sounds. Every single thing a boy picks up…he has a noise to go with it.  I believe, it is in his DNA.  I didn't train my boy to make noises.  He did them automatically, on his own.  Using HIS imagination.

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They see the world much differently than we (girls) do.  And I like it!

This gender neutral parenting idea is preposterous!  Seriously, it is astounding!  Why would any parent find this necessary?  God didn't make us to be just neutral.  He specifically made Adam to be a man and then Eve (from Adam's rib) to be a woman!  He did that for a reason.  Part of that reason was because he had different jobs for each of them to do.  I'm a woman and I celebrate the difference between my husband and me.  He is uniquely different than me.  His strengths and abilities compliment mine and mine the same for him.  While we both can do almost everything the other can do, some things are better suited for the other of us.  I like it that way.  He likes it that way.

Last night, I questioned him (my hubby) about a weird knife that kept popping up on the kitchen counter.  He was obviously using it for something, but everytime I went in the kitchen….there it was, again.  I couldn't figure out what he was using it for and why he was leaving it on the counter afterwards.  He thought I was crazy for asking and told me that he was using it to peel oranges.  Which led me to ask why he didn't wash it and put it away or at least stick it in the sink.  His logic?  "I don't know, I just forget I guess."

We are different.  He sees life from a man view and I see it from a woman view.  It's good that way!  I don't need him trekking on my turf.  I don't want him to be feminine.  I like him rough, a bit harsh and stubborn.  I appreciate his softness towards me and our girls because I know I can count on him to be strong and lead us with manly courage.  He isn't neutral about anything and that's because he is living life as a man that was allowed to grow from a boy into a man. 

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There is joy in being different.  I love watching the interaction between my husband and son.  They have a playfulness and a hunger for adventure.  The stuff that gets their engine roaring never fazes my girls or me.  We get giddy over a cute outfit, our guys…..care less.  Guys have a way of chasing danger where we girls face danger when we run out of shopping money or room to put the stuff we found on sale.  That's risky living, huh?

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I don't want to be a guy.  I'm not above doing stuff they do, but I'm thankful they don't make me.

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Who wants to do that?

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Or that?  Not me.  And probably not you if you are a woman.  Men have muscles (we do too) and God designed his body to handle man-sized situations.  Whew, aren't you glad?

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Guys typically….enjoy being guys.  At least, mine do.

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Most girls…..won't get caught DEAD dressed like that.  Am I right?

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Every day is an adventure to a guy. 

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who's taller

A competition.

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Challenge is in their blood.

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I don't want to take that urge away.  Do you?

That's why I can't grasp such a purposeful kind of parenting such as gender neutral.  It's a farce!  It's a crazy idea and I hope and pray…..you aren't even considering it.  Why?  Because..

Each of us have been assigned a sex and we have so much to celebrate by being who we were born to be.  As a mother of a boy and two girls, I have the opportunity to teach them to embrace who they are IN CHRIST JESUS as well as in their genetic makeup.  My son, while rowdy, silly and adventurous is still loving, tender and compassionate.  I didn't have to strip him to a neutral being to make him a fair human in the world of male & female.  Nor did I with my girls have to train them to play with trucks and guns to give them a manly edge.  It's a joy to be who we are and I'm willing to shout it from the mountain tops!

We are different.  Let's keep it that way!