Posts Tagged ‘words’

Can’t Take It Back

Tuesday, January 26th, 2016

There’s not a mom (or a person) alive that hasn’t said something they wish they could take back. Words spoken in anger or frustration can haunt for life….haunt the receiver and the giver.

words that hurt

I grew up with a lot of verbal abuse. It wasn’t much for my mom to lose her mind and spew some pretty hateful words my way. Some of them (most of them) have never left my head or heart. Words for her were ammunition and saying mean things was her weapon of choice. It never occurred to her that what she said left deep forever wounds. She just said what she thought and let the hearer deal with all the rest.

Hurting people…..hurt people.

I read a story this week about a mom who out of frustration….screamed at her daughter — “You’re just like your father!”. Now, for some that’s not a bad thing. But I think we all know that when something like that is said by an angry mom, it’s not meant as a compliment. Especially when it’s a divorced mom who harbors anger towards the ex-husband/father. Kids know, they know how we feel about EVERYONE! All the people, ever in our lives….our kids know.

Don’t tell me you believe your kids have no idea who you like and don’t like. Ha!

words all over

I’ve used words to hurt the ones I love the most too many times in my life. I regret the things I’ve said out of anger or even not feeling well. Think: hangry. Words, once spoken cannot be taken back only forgiven. Which means, they stay there….lingering on the soul and replaying in the mind.

Terrible thought, huh?

mind games

So, here’s my advice: WATCH WHAT YOU SAY!

If you are someone who uses sarcasm or smarty comments as part of your normal conversation, rethink it! Instead, hold back with the “funny” banter and just talk, minus any hurtful comments. Believe it or not, it’s a habit. The more you speak one way the easier it becomes to continue.

Saying things like:

You’re ridiculous!
You never…
You are just like ______!
I hate you!
I can’t take anymore!!
You’re driving me crazy!

not funny

Somebody somewhere is writing your words on their heart. Are you using them with love and care or are you pounding them into a heart broken and bruised?

Remember, you can’t take it back!

Talk It Out

Wednesday, September 10th, 2014

I noticed something very interesting as I sat out on my porch last night.  As couples were out on their evening walk, some had their pups on a leash, a few were wearing flip-flops, a couple were speed walking but the one thing they all had in common?

Wives doing all the talking.

talk too much

I mean, really talking!  I don't think I heard anything more than a grunt or ugh-huh from any one of the men walking by.  I know it sounds silly to notice such a thing and I surely wasn't looking for it but what about it?  Ladies?

Do you do all the talking in your relationship?

I came to the conclusion that I too can be a bit chatty.  Not all the time, but I can go on and on about stuff that I'm almost sure my hubby could care less about.  However, like the good fella's I saw out walking with their wives…..he indulges me.  He listens (at least some of the time) gives appropriate nods here and there and when something catches his fancy, chimes in as if he's really into the one-sided conversation.

she talks

I love that about him.

Here's the deal.  Women are full of words (usually).  We think of all sorts of important things to tell our men when we're not with them.  Sometimes, we sit on good stuff so long it feels like it's going to burst out of us.  So, when we see our true love….talking is at the top of our to-do list.  The trouble with that is most husband's have talked out all their words during their busy day and are ready for some brain incubation.

quiet man

Perhaps, this is why men love to get outside and DO something physical.  My hubby says he solves all sorts of problems in his head while he's mowing the yard.  He gets some of his greatest praying done as well.  Not talking has its perks! 

I totally get every woman passing by my house — we can't hold back!  Talking is how we love, it's how we share our hearts.  We are full of thoughts and our only way of coping is spilling them out.  There are a great number of successful women authors, don't you think?  They probably learned talking too much just didn't work so writing gave them the outlet to say what couldn't be shushed

I don't post this to be negative in any way to chatty women.  I just found it funny watching the interaction between the women versus the men.  Each lady spoke with passion, hands waving…..voice rising up high and then dropping down low.  All while hubby's hung on…quietly taking it all in.  I wondered if any of them wanted to say anything but by the looks of it, they had already figured it out ——->

She needed to TALK IT OUT!

gracious words