Queenies Little Kingdom

Confession: I’ve been sitting home like a bump on a log for days. Like, several days in a row.

Truth: I feel my mind and body atrophying right before my eyes.

For those of you with summers off, it can be a slippery slope to laziness if you’re not careful. It all starts out rather innocently, resting up from a long busy year. But staying stuck there, dangerous!

I realized yesterday that even my hubby was picking up on my sedentary suicide when he suggested we take our bikes to a park trail in town and do some adventuring. I almost said, no. Once you’re in the vortex of doing nothing…..it continues to suck you down further.

Get out now while you still can. Oh, who am I kidding? No one else is being a slug like me. Most other people are out living!! Overachievers!

To inspire you (the you’s who are lounging around a bit longer than you should be) I’ve come up with a list of MUST DO’S for the summer. You’re welcome!

Clean up your porch or wherever you like to sit outside of your house. Add a few new plants or flowers, hang a comfy swing or put out some rocking chairs. Then get out there and enjoy them! Do it every day, unless it’s raining. If it’s raining, stay in unless you like playing in the rain. Maybe a good rain dance will get you out of your funk, I don’t know. Just get motivated.

I was grouchy and totally jerky by the time my hubby suggested our bike ride last night. Don’t let your sluggishness get you there. Get out and take a walk or ride your bike. If you have a jeep or motorcycle (God protect you) take them out for an evening spin. The weather is amazing right now and the bugs in your teeth all wash out. I promise.

Get outside! If you were like me, growing up….you played outside all summer long. There’s something good about being outside and running wild. Same with cooking outside. Food just tastes better when it’s cooked over a fire or on a grill. If you have a fire pit, crank that dude up and gather around. It’s relaxing and a fun way to spend a summer evening with the people you love.

Paint some Twister dots on your lawn, invent a water balloon game, get out your croquet kit or badminton net…whatever it is that your family screams with laughter doing. In Indiana, Cornhole boards are still the rage. Challenge Papaw to a mean game of Cornhole. Do something that involves getting wild and crazy outside. You’ll sleep like a baby and you’ll make memories.

You read that right! Get out and go camping! For weeks, my hubby and I have been whining about hitting the campground with our little tent and blow-up mattress. Call us crazy, but it’s fun! Over the last 25 years, we’ve done a lot of camping. With all that sleeping under the stars have come some of our best memories. I believe every family should camp at least once in their family’s journey. I guarantee, NO ONE will ever forget it. Besides, the food. Camp food is absolutely the best food ever. Hello, S’mores? Duh!

Don’t squander your summer away sitting on the couch. Don’t waste time with your kids that you can’t get back. Don’t let your bum grow fatter because you can’t get moving. Don’t don’t don’t!

Summer only lasts 8 or 9 weeks; take some mini trips, grow something in your garden that you’ll eat, build a fire out back, race your kids in the backyard, invite friends over for a cookout, swim day & night, turn your music up, take the top off your Jeep, stop for ice cream or make your own, have a homemade pizza night, host a sleepover, hang a fun flag representing your family, decorate in & out for summer activities, have a balloon fight, share memories of old, go to a matinee movie, eat fresh veggies, take pictures, drink lemonade, go fishing, take kids on “dates” separately, try a new restaurant, eat out on the patio, hop in the hot tub, put your hair in a ponytail and have fun!

Be ready for belly laughs and lots of smiling faces. Summer fun is what it’s all about!

Since last Thursday’s A/C breakdown Summer 2015, I have had nothing but the run-around from the gods known as A/C repairmen. First, I was told Monday between 11-3 to expect a repairman then just a few hours later he called back and changed it to 12-3 on Monday. I waited all day Monday and finally called at the end of the day only to get (the same dude, Derek) told that my appointment was for Tuesday, not Monday. Duh?!

Will it surprise you that the name of the company is QUALITY AIR?

I asked Derek why I wasn’t called or told that on the second call and he LIED TO ME and said, the guy who called me made a mistake. I told him that HE WAS the guy who called me back and then his Pinnochio nose grew even longer as he stretched the lie even further. Jesus, take the wheel! He called me back later that night at 9:00pm to confirm another appointment with a technician for Tuesday at 4:00pm.

Yea, guess who didn’t come on Tuesday? Not at 4 or 5 or 6 or 7pm? So, I gave up.

Would you feel aggravated? If you’re like me, you might. Afterall, a service agreement with someone usually means they work for you (in some round-a-bout way) and….it’s normal to feel worthy of good service. Am I right? Not some wacky wishy washy hit or miss calls and zero work. Yes?

But, hey. Stuff happens. Calls get bumped ahead of you. Emergencies happen. I’m a reasonable person. However, a phone call letting the customer know would have been nice. Except, that’s not how it goes sometimes.

We are currently living in a world that is mediocre. Service is allowed to be shoddy. Customer reps can be rude and even hang up on you with no repurcussion. Company reps can lie to the customer and not have to answer for it. Lazy employees can ignore or avoid customers and no one will ever be held accountable. Automated answering systems can be so tricky even the best and most experienced caller can’t figure out how to speak to a real person (ahhh, they’re good aren’t they?). Poor attitudes or pathetic NON ANSWERS are now acceptable with companies who are obviously not concerned with losing anyone’s business. It’s a janked up business world.

This morning, I put through my first call to my home warranty company regarding my issue with the A/C company. They are who referred me to the A/C company in the first place. I sat on hold, after clicking through every push #1 for this and push #3 for that until 10 minutes had passed. Finally, when “Oscar” got on the line, I explained my situation and that I still needed my A/C serviced he stops me and says that HE CANNOT DO ANYTHING with my case because they are having system updates and his computer is down.

Wonk, wonk!

He can’t help a systems update, I get that. But what about a message to callers that says, WE ARE DOWN….WE CANNOT HELP YOU WITH ANY CLAIMS? Is that an impossible thought? A 10 minute wait on the phone only to be told, Sorry, can’t help you. You’ll have to call back! Then, the best part of my morning — I would have to call back.

I called back, it only took two tries but I made it through to a nice lady who listened to my case, assigned me a new one and even tried to get the company to push me to the top of their list.

I’m still waiting. I have faith, there will be an end to my problem.

In the meantime, a phone call from one of my grown kids pushed me into yet another glimpse of how unprofessional companies are allowed to be these days. Her issue was with an employer and some of the behavior that just sounds unreal. Again, what can you do? They are the bosses and they have the power to behave however they want. It’s just a frustrating world. There are no guarantees for job security, no expectations for high quality service when in a business contract and not much you can do when someone gives you the run around on the phone. We just have to take it.

What is happening with our society? What happened to quality expectations with excellent customer service? What happened to employee and employer loyalty? What’s the deal? Is this the new norm?

If it is…..Oh boy! We’re in for a wing-dinger of a world. Brace yourselves!

Go, friends. Seize the day!!! Even if you get a little run around.

If you read yesterday’s birthday manifesto and still came back here to read my words, GOD BLESS YOU FRIEND! It’s a little like helping someone move. You want to be a good friend and help, but….dang! Moving is such a pain. So is reading some mom go on and on about her awesome perfect incredible amazing son. It’s a little painful.

So, thank you for reading and still coming back for more. You are bettah than buttah!

Let’s talk about JUNE! It has to be one of the most glorious months of the year, don’t you think? The weather is finally changing to summer warm, kids are out of school, swimsuits become regular attire and eating outside is a lovely dining experience. No more winter blues. And the gardens, oh my…the gardens are growing and taking shape for some incredible bountiful harvest. I can’t wait.

How cool is it to point out some of the best things about June? I’ll tell ya!

Ever wonder what’s so special about being born in June? Well, probably not but I thought this was interesting.

Or how about a workout challenge for the month of June?

What about a few interesting facts:

Ever wondered what’s in season during June?

Or hey, need a photo challenge for the month?

I know everybody wants to know WHAT TO BUY IN JUNE:

1) Spring Clothes
2) Dishware
3) Gym memberships
4) BBQ & Picnic supplies
5) Tools
6) Dairy products
7) Donuts (Huh?)

Oh and we can’t forget to celebrate DAD!!

See all the fun to be had in June?

Ahhhhhhh….

25 years ago, I became a Mom. For me, it’s a blink in time. For you, it’s your whole life. Your one simple act of being born turned me into the person I always wanted to be, a mom. I don’t want this letter to be about me, however, I can’t write about you without including me. Afterall, it’s my story of you and what the last 25 years have meant to me.

The year I turned 22 (October 12th, 1988) was one of the saddest birthday’s I’ve ever experienced. Just 2 days earlier, the phone call that would change my world and force me to grow up came without any warning. My grandmother (Granny to me and all her grandchildren) was dead. She sat down in a chair after changing the laundry and quietly slipped away. She was waiting to visit my grandfather in the hospital. She was home, alone. Nothing could bring her back and I knew that but my heart was broken in two. I loved her more than anyone in my family. She was, for me, the picture of constant love. During my lifetime, my granny had given me all the love she had and never expected anything from me in return. She gave unconditionally to me and I knew it. She made me feel like I was her favorite (even though she had a long list of other grandkids to love). After I returned back home from the hardest funeral of my life, there in the mail was my birthday card from Granny. I’ve held onto that card all these years because it was the last thing that connected her to me. She had to have walked that card down to the mailbox the very day she died. For me, it was a huge reminder….that I was on her mind the day she left this earth. That’s who she was to me, the person who loved me with all her being. I’ll never get over being loved by her.

I tell you that story because for me….I’ve found that I wished I had more words from the people I’ve loved and have loved me in return. What I wouldn’t give to hear or read what my heart believes about my grandmother’s feelings for me. I know without a doubt, she loved me like crazy. Our relationship was special. I would spend all my summers with her; eating her fluffy scrambled eggs in the morning….visiting her parents in the nursing home and running to the bank and grocery after cashing Grandaddy’s check. I had a front row seat into her life while most of my other cousins were home with their parents doing what kids do all summer. My time with her was ordinary to most but for me, I realize now that I was gifted with the greatest of all gifts and that was her time.

Your arrival into my life came just a few years later. October 1988 I said goodbye to my granny and just short of 2 years, you were on the scene. My heart was blown out of all sorts of proportion. I wished so badly that my granny was there to love you like she loved me. I couldn’t make that happen but I could do what I was called to do and that was to be the best mother I could be to you. You were a boy that had been prayed for and dreamed about for most of my life. Being a mom was all I ever thought about growing up. Most girls wanted to do crazy wild things with their lives, I wanted to hold and love on the children God would give to me. I would picture myself making their meals, rocking and singing while kissing on their perfect faces. It was a destiny that God placed in my heart and eventually made true and it all started with you.

Really, it all started with the person you call dad. He was the pushy one who felt certain I was the girl for him. Looking back, I’m grateful he had the insight that I didn’t and that I went along with him and got married that beautiful September day. While I love all three of my children, neither of you have the piece of my heart that belongs just to dad. His love for me and mine for him is a very unique and fulfilling love. We CHOOSE to love each other where parental love is a born love. How can you not love a person born of you? That doesn’t make sense. God gave me dad and then thankfully, equipped me with a heart that loves him in spite of errors or shortcomings. A little like parental love but truly still different.

It was a surprise to find out we were having a baby not long after our honeymoon. A huge surprise! I worried what others would think, if they would believe I was a pregnant bride that had to get married (those were the days people did that). All my dreams were coming true but I was weighed down with what other people would think of me. Then, you came early. Even better. Thanks kid!

You spent your first 5 days in NICU. You were the fattest, prettiest baby boy in that place. Everyone was in love with you right from the start. Which is a rather good summary of the last 25 years. You are a bright spot, a joy and a heart capturing human. People are drawn to you and they always have been. I believe it’s because God wants to use you in the lives of those around you (and I’ve seen that happen over & over in the last 25 years). Your dad and I were overwhelmed by everything about you. You were ours and both of us felt deeply undeserving. You were perfect and we were suddenly faced with the fact that neither of us were close to that…..now, what were we to do with you?

When I first saw you there in the special incubator, I wondered if I’d ever be able to love you like you deserved. All my insecurities banged around in my head like a bullet loose in a box. That’s when I learned to push through silly thoughts and do what needed to be done, to mother my sweet boy.

No one can really tell you how those first moments will be when you hold your child close to you. I think it’s different for every person. For me, I felt all my dreams coming true. I was finally a mother. I had my very own person to hold and love. It was go time! Time to get serious about raising up a great human. That’s been my life goal. I think it worked. You’re 25 today and a pretty great human (if I do say so myself). Goal – check!

A great human wasn’t all I had on my mom agenda though. I wanted to be a source of love and genuine care. I wanted you to know and love God, the God who created you and shared you with dad & me. I spent hours looking into your eyes, speaking words of affirmation and gentleness into your heart. From the beginning of your life, you loved music and singing. I held you and sang every single song both real and made up for hours and hours. The love I experienced from taking care of you was a love like I’d never known. It was the love I was meant to feel and because of that, it was the kind of love God had in mind for you.

If I had to use 3 words to describe you, I would pick — ADVENTUROUS, HAPPY & FUNLOVING.

ADVENTUROUS – From the start, you were a go-getter of a baby. Nothing was impossible for you. I used to think it was just a first-born thing but the truth is, that was just who God made you to be. You were curious, inquisitive and outgoing. Your dad & I couldn’t believe how quickly you did everything. You were 19 pounds at 4 months old. That’s a chunky dude. You only crawled for a few days, just long enough to get yourself up on something so you could start balancing for bigger things. You were a climber. You climbed up on and even moved things around so that you could navigate higher and higher to whatever it was that you were wanting to reach. Luckily for me, you were never a mean kid. You were sweet spirited and loving. I remember the day I recognized a huge part of who you were as a compassionate person. You accidentally bumped into a girl in a wheelchair at church. It was very innocent but you were so concerned that you had hurt or even embarrassed her in some way that it broke you in two. Dad and I tried to assure you she was okay (she did too) and that it was only an accident but your heart was so grieved that you would have anything to do with hurting another person that it poured out of you through tears. I thanked God for your gentleness and your awareness that YOU weren’t the only person on this earth and I asked Him to help me guide you to always possess a love for others that kept God’s laws first. Loving one another.

HAPPY – I hold inside my heart every smile and laugh you’ve ever blurted out. Which, is many. Your smile has gotten me through some hard days. Your happy attitude has always been encouraging and a source of freedom for me. It reminds me, life is short…get over it and laugh. You’ve been the happiest kid your whole life. You seek out and look for the fun. You love being joyful and honestly, it’s just who you are. When I picture you, I always see you smiling. From the toothless grins as a baby to the brace-face smiles of a middle school twerp, smiling is how I’ll always see you in my mind. Your zest for life and your burning desire to make things happen inspire me and they have been one of the greatest ways God has used you to influence me to be a better mom.

FUNLOVING – Being a mom is hard work. It’s a huge responsibility. Being a dad might be too, but dad’s get a lot of freedom that mom’s don’t get. They tend to be the fun one. I used to be jealous that your dad and you could play and be wild together while I was doing all the home responsibilities. I would watch as the two of you laughed and carried on as I cooked our dinner or folded the laundry. You would do whatever crazy shenanigan your dad encouraged you to do; jump off the roof into the swimming pool at 3, jump ramps with your bike, climb to the top of whatever was the tallest location of something to climb, swim to the deepest part of the ocean or pool, wear full on superhero attire every day, live as a life-saving vigilante, protect little sisters under your wing, lead good guy clubs on the playground at recess, start your own Bible gang at school, teach yourself how to play whatever musical instrument interested you, buy a friend new tennis shoes because he always got hand-me-downs and you didn’t, salute the flag when a patriotic song came on, pray aloud when everyone else was too afraid, speak up when a friend asked you to let him cheat off of you, admitted the struggle it was when girls weren’t dressing modestly, made friends NO MATTER where we were or where they were from, treated teachers with respect and admiration, loved learning new things, conquered every challenge that you set your mind to and did it all with a funloving spirit. Wow, it’s been fun being your mom.

So, on this day…the day you turn 25, let me tell you how blessed I am because God loved me enough to share you with me. I am blown away, totally overwhelmed with joy that you are my sweet boy. You’ve taught me a lifetime of lessons, some, learned the hard way others sweet and funny just like you. Being your mom is one of my greatest achievements! Some wish for big fancy degrees, I only wish that I could be the kind of mother and grandmother that makes my kids proud. One that made life special and taught the true meaning of love and acceptance. Your life has meaning, meaning to me. Elliot Richardson said, “To be a complete person is to be a part of others, and share a part of them”. I feel like a complete person because of being a part of you. I’ve played a role a very important part in who you are and I’m so proud that I got included.

Keep on climbing son. Go as high as you can because there’s nothing stopping you. You have a lifetime of joy waiting for you up ahead. May you always know the love I feel and the pride inside my heart custom-made just for you.

I love you,
Mom