Confession: I’m NOT a love doctor.
I’m not even a love doctor’s assistant.
I’ve gotten a lot better at loving my husband in 25+ years. I used to spend a lot of my time trying to make myself happy. It didn’t work. Perhaps the focus on self was the problem, I don’t know. Once I learned (the hard way, of course) to love him and focus on his happiness….things got a whole lot better for me. And for him.
Want to know how to love your husband? Better? Good, because for free dollars…I’m throwing out 6 ways. You’re welcome!
S I X W A Y S
Way 1 – Change your ATTITUDE.
I’ve learned the hard way that my attitude can either ruin the day or make it exceptional. “If mama ain’t happy….” rings true! Even in the midst of stress and difficulties, if I react positively…my hubby handles trouble with a lot more resilience. If I huff & puff, it turns the situation to “Katie, bar the door!”. My ability to manage my attitude has gotten much better as I’ve aged. I just wish I’d have known then (back 20 or so years ago) what I know now.
Husbands carry a lot of weight around on their shoulders. They have a long list of people to please. More than anyone else on his list, you (me) are at the top to make happy. Make sure your attitude is a good one and speak positively. He’s going to notice. Just wait and see.
Way 2 – Be a YES girl.
How often do you say no throughout your day? No to this, no to that. But have you ever thought about saying YES? Try it.
Say yes to watching the show he’s been wanting to see. Say yes to the restaurant that he loves but never gets to go to because you hate it. Say yes to the time alone that he’s been asking for. Say yes to spending the day with his family or friends. Say yes to the dream he’s been talking about. Say yes to whatever it is that matters to him. You’re going to love the sparkle in his eyes from knowing he has your blessing.
Way 3 – Give up grudges.
Don’t pretend you don’t have any, I know you do. We all do. Stop holding his errors or shortcomings against him. He is the leader of your household (God said it, not me) and he deserves a clean slate. If he held all your mistakes over on you, you’d be a force to be reckoned with (wouldn’t you?). Learn from me, forgive him for whatever it is in your head that makes you mad or frustrated with him. You will be MUCH HAPPIER and so will he.
Note: A good way to prove to your hubby that you’re over something is to encourage him with your words when a similar issue comes up. Instead of berating him for the time he goofed, build him up with your superpower words.
Way 4 – TOUCH him.
Men are physical, it’s part of their DNA. Touch the heck out of him. I remember when my kids were little, I didn’t require a lot of marital touch (if you know what I mean). Long days of little kids crawling all over you can be more stimulation than a mama can take. Now, I crave being close to my hubby. I like being affectionate and loving with him. Husbands don’t always say it, but they thrive on the affection they get from their wives. It’s another way to boost their confidence. Why wouldn’t we want to give our husband’s the one thing he can ONLY GET from us? He can hear affirming words from co-workers or the boss, a loving touch….not appropriate. That’s your job.
Way 5 – Write 10 things you love about him and give it to him.
Use a journal and write in it often. Share it with him periodically. You’ll be very surprised at how much he’ll love this. Try it. I mean it!
Way 6 – Build him up in front of others.
This might shock you….but, your husband could care less what anyone else in the world thinks about him. Except YOU. He will cross burning bridges with no shoes on just with the power he feels knowing YOU THINK HE’S AMAZING! You’re a one woman powerhouse. Why not use your power to build up the man of your dreams.
Oh and in case you haven’t noticed, your kids are watching. The way you talk to him and about him, they are paying very close attention to. Make sure you are focusing on his BEST qualities and not his mistakes. 😉
Loving one another isn’t always easy. I challenge you to try these tips and kick things up a notch. Your marriage will be the envy of everyone around you. I promise.
