Posts Tagged ‘Mel Gibson’

I need my own reality show…

Thursday, July 15th, 2010

Everytime I see the different crazy shows offered on tv…..I crack up! What in the world? “I Didn’t Know I Was Pregnant”? Huh? Who is the idiot claiming that one? Seriously! Umm, are you completely NOT living with your own body? There is NO WAY….that before delivery takes place….YOU DIDN’T HAVE A FLIPPIN CLUE!!!! People, pregnancy is uncomfortable at least some of the time. Oh and the baby belly….even chubby can’t hide a wiggly baby!

I’m not buying it, ya’ll! Nope! Not gonna!

Back to MY show! If people are looking to find entertainment in the sheer wackiness of life…..allow me to volunteer! I’ve got a little idea for a show on P M S !! Yes, I said it! It’s one of those indescribable forces that NO MAN can reckon with. Literally! Men beware! Both yesterday and today….were my my family’s lucky day! It’s really not funny. Thankfully, my people love me and care for me. Otherwise they’d all report me and I’d go to “hormone jail”. {If it exists, like I think it does!!}

I couldn’t stop feeling so edgy and boohoo-ey! I loathe that feeling! It’s inescapable! I want to feel normal…but my body just won’t cooperate! Maybe I’m not alone. I kid about having my own PMS Reality tv show. No one wants to see mama go all “Mel Gibson” on anyone. It’s shameful!

I didn’t write this list…but I feel confident that I could’ve. Please read and note…..these moments come and thank goodness they always GO!! I’m looking forward to a better day tomorrow! 🙂

13 possible meanings for PMS:
1. Pass My Shotgun
2. Psychotic Mood Shift
3. Perpetual Munching Spree
4. Puffy Mid-Section
5. People Make me Sick
6. Provide Me with Sweets
7. Pardon My Sobbing
8. Pimples May Surface
9. Pass My Sweatpants
10. Pissy Mood Syndrome
11. Plainly; Men Suck
12. Pack My Stuff
13. Potential Murder Suspect

# 2 & 7 were my evil nemesis today!

Lord,
You love me. Even knowing me intimately like you do! Thank you for creating me with such thought and care. Help me to manage this very delicate and unique ability I have to be completely out of my mind. I only want to honor you….and it isn’t always easy to do when your body feels out of whack!
Amen

And let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, to which indeed you were called in one body; and be thankful. Col. 3:15