Queenies Little Kingdom

I’ve been married long enough to my hubby….to notice, he’s gotten some things figured out.

I mean, about women. Or, about me, our girls and our needs.

Don’t misunderstand, he’s not perfect. Although, he’s pretty darned close. He’s got his own baggage (don’t we all?) and he makes plenty of mistakes. But he’s also rather adept at handling the “ladies” in his life AND I REALLY LOVE THAT ABOUT HIM!!

Take for instance this morning. He hates early mornings, even more than me. However, that didn’t stop him from offering to give our daughter a ride to work extra early so her boyfriend could pick her up for a date directly from her office today.

See? Nice guy.

Sometimes, showing love is just as important as speaking love.

Just like every person, unmet needs can really wear down the love in relationships. It’s not always easy to speak up and share needs, it almost feels selfish to have them. Maybe that’s just my people-pleasing personality talking. I have needs! There, I said it.

Every person does.

What happens if you never focus on what your spouse needs?

I’ll tell you. You end up with a crappy marriage. For those who stick together, they move on to other things. Some even go so far as to find someone else to meet those unmet needs. Other’s just stay stuck and miserable, while resentment and animosity builds to dangerous levels. Maybe you know someone in that kind of relationship right now. It’s awful!

Marriage is harder than brain surgery. (my opinion)

One of the best ways for me to get my needs met is to be honest and tell my hubby what they are. For the most part, he knows me well enough to already know the big ones. Still, every day “needs” pop up and I have to let him in on them because MEN ARE NOT MIND READERS!

My hubby knows I need —

His attention.
His encouragement.
His adoration.
His help.
His night-driving skills.
His acceptance.
His money.
His brain (he shares with me, thanks babe).
His leadership.
His trust.
His strength.
His willingness to do what I hate.
His kindness.
His forgiveness.
His understanding.
His grace.
His faithfulness.
His ability to overlook some things.
His desire.
His love for our kids.
His respect.
His time.

That’s all. (Ha!)

Honey,

Thank you for the many ways you go out of your way to meet my needs. Not all of them are easy and I realize that. Still, you never think I’m outlandish and I love that about you. You really have set the bar high for our girls. What a man!

I LOVE YOU,
W

Dog owners are my kind of people.

As I stood in line behind a guy chatting it up with the clerk yesterday….I couldn’t help but overhear their conversation about their cats.

The chat was rather lengthy as they compared notes on each cat and their habits & attitudes. However, when they both pulled out their phones and clicked on several pictures of their furry little people haters (I know, come at me cat people!)….

I had to speak up!

DOGS ARE SPECIAL TOO!

They, lost in their own little cat loving world hadn’t noticed the line forming behind them and that everyone was listening to their dog-dissing yacking! The guy had the nerve to even say, “Dog people are just weird!”.

WHAT?

NO, HE DIDN’T! (fightin’ words!)

I’m no pet expert but I am a dog lover and I’ve had a few million cats over my lifetime. The two, do not compare. While I believe fully that cats can be really cool (I totally dig my Aunt Pat’s cat, Tom!) for the most part…. cats are weird. They have completely different personalities than dogs and usually call all the shots in the relationship.

Dogs are people-pleasers! Cats are cat-pleasers!

There, I said it.

See the difference?

Mother’s Day 2016! My new favorite weekend! I spent it with my two beautiful girls and I don’t remember a single stressful moment! They are so much fun!

They spent their whole weekend JUST hanging out with me. Every time I’m with them, I realize just how similar to me (they both are). Each of them, uniquely coupled with some minute part of me. It’s a lot of fun to compare behaviors and attitudes….until they’re NOT flattering ones. Then, I just pretend I have NO IDEA what they are talking about. Hehe!

Who knew we’d be twinning when we came downstairs to go shopping?

As if, once was not enough…

We didn’t even call each other!! Ha!

Geez, are we alike or what?

It was a little too rainy and cold for me to get in the hot-tub so Ally and I bonded through the window!

Just about everything we do is filled with some sort of shenanigan!

They blow me away with their sweetness!

By the way, I love every gift they lavished upon me but the greatest part of my weekend was having them around to fill up my heart with more of them!

Oh, my gifts!! Earrings, 2 gorgeous orchids, PINK TULIPS (from Bryce, Gates boyfriend), beautiful pictures of my boy in Columbia, a cute t-shirt dress and the coolest COW PICTURE ever!! And, they cleaned the kitchen after Sunday lunch!
WOW!!

My hubby can’t stop himself either (gifts are his love language). Not only did I get a new purse, he manicured our yard to a perfect lush green haven, he built a gorgeous wooden top for a wrought iron table stand (I love), worked on my car, cleaned up the garage and finished a wooden bench for me to paint. He was hustlin!! All weekend long, while I partied like I was away with my best girlfriends!!

It was fabulous!

I really missed my boy!! But, he called from Texas and we ate lunch while he told us all about what’s happening in his life there.

Mother’s Day 2016!! My favorite ME weekend, ever! Thank you kids, I love each of you so much!!

What has a beginning but has no end? Being a mother.

I have a heart full of MOMents.

I keep them filed away in my mind.

I’m proud to say being a mother has been my greatest accomplishment.

In a world full of people, the ones you mother become the ones that matter the most.

To get a peek at how much God loves you and me – He gives us children to love.

Some feel like they have to give up important things in life to be a mother. I say, the most important thing I’ve ever done is mother.

God creatively places each child with the perfect mother. Not that she’s perfect just that she’s perfect for her child.

Some mother’s get lots of choices while others only get one.

The days are long but the time is short. Enjoy the journey because it’s fast & furious!

If I could choose a favorite memory – I’d say every day. Even the ones that didn’t seem to matter much.

Which isn’t really true. They all matter.

Every day, Mom’s have an opportunity to love and invest in who their children will someday be.

Loving someone who throws up in your car, draws on your walls and keeps you up at night is like the boot camp of life.

Not every person is lovable. Not every kid is loved.

Being a mom taught me to love someone more than I ever love myself. And that was a lot.

I didn’t quite grasp the gravity of actually mothering 3 children every day until they were all grown up. Still, they turned out pretty darn good.

Like most other moms, I’ve stomped down the tough times. I hide them or try to scatter them like a pile of papers in the wind. Who wants to linger over the big goofs!?

Thankfully, children are pretty forgiving. They want you to succeed even when you’re convinced they are trying their hardest to flunk you.

Don’t ever ask for patience in mothering. It’s a useless waste of time. Ask for energy. You’re going to use more of it than you ever believe you have.

Being a mother isn’t our only job. For those of us with a husband – we still have to love his socks off. Especially in front of our kids.

It’ll be worth it later. You’re kind of stuck together. And it’s a good thing!

Forgiving yourself has to be a regular everyday decision. There’s no way to be a mom without making huge mistakes.

If I never live to be an old old woman….. My heart and life could not feel any fuller. My very best parts of me are the 3 people God hand-picked just for me – to mother!

I LOVE BEING YOUR MOM – GAVIN

I LOVE BEING YOUR MOM – Ally

I LOVE BEING YOUR MOM – Gates

Happy Mother’s Day, friends.