Posts Tagged ‘reflection’

The First 3 Rows

Monday, June 25th, 2018

If I were to ask you, “What are you doing with your life?” right this moment….how would you answer? Let me ask it another way, What are you living for? What gets you up out of bed and pushes you to do what you do? Why are you doing it? Are you simply on the treadmill of life, working a job every day…paying bills, waiting for that call to glory?

I only ask because so often many of us get trapped in this cycle of repetition and lose focus on the stuff that really matters in life.

As a woman, I’ve definitely relied on what the world has conditioned me to think was important for me and my life. I followed a plan. Not too risky, not too pathetic but just right as to not be judged or ridiculed by what society says is a worthy style of living. You know, tip-toe carefully around really living out loud.

Who wants to step on anyone’s toes? Not me.

From a graveside, I heard a gentleman describe his life in 10 year chunks. He was reflecting back on his relationship with his mother. She had been dead 10 years at this point and he reminisced about what life looked like when she was alive. He was B U S Y! He was on the hustle. He worked very long hours, he met with tons of clients and he spent hours on the phone with people who really have no connection to him or his life other than work. As he thought back, he realized most every person from that time period of his life were completely gone from his life. As in, no longer associated with through work or otherwise. They were gone. Not gone as in death, just gone. Many aren’t even in business anymore.

The person who mattered most to him during that time, his mother….she was gone too. Breast cancer ravaged her body and she passed away when he was 31 years old. He admits, he spent time with her and called her on the regular but many of those instances, he was pre-occupied or on the phone talking work. She always loved his visits, enjoyed every bit of him when he was around and was certainly understanding of work stuff.

Probably like many of you & me.

Work is work. It hogs up time. But, geez…we have to work. Bills don’t pay themselves. Not many of us are rolling around in dollar bills that afford us to just do whatever we want every day.

Truthfully? Even if we were able to do that, many of us would choose other things over the most important people in our lives anyway.

Imagine with me, if you passed away today….look at the first 3 rows of people sitting at your funeral. Who are they? Why are they there? Did you love them well? Did you give them your undivided attention and time? Do they know how much you loved them? Did you push them aside to chase other things? Things that don’t matter so much now?

I will tell you, the last 2 years of my life have given me such a different perspective on life. I never realized how much I took for granted until it was slowly yanked away. For me, no one I love passed away….only a job loss. Through that process, I’ve come to value the people in my life much more carefully than the pretty house, porch….flowers and freedom I once thought was so great.

Don’t misunderstand, stuff isn’t bad and neither is working hard a negative thing. Scripture is clear that we are to work and earn what we get in this life. The people in our lives, deserve to know how much we love them.

I see clearly the people in the first 3 rows of my life & death. They are there because of me. They loved me and I will make it my priority to make sure they know of my love for them. All the things of this world will pass away, so will the people. How well you and I love, how we’ve made others feel and the time we’ve invested will not fade away.

6 ways to show your first 3 rows people you love them:

1. Give them your time.

2. Be trustworthy.

3. Allow room for faults.

4. Speak up. Say meaningful words.

5. Forgive quickly.

6. Hug and hold tight. Physical touch is powerful.

I’m here on this earth for a reason. Help me to show YOUR LOVE and my own love to everyone you place in my path.


Monday, August 20th, 2012

I'm so good at learning life the hard way.  I'm sure you can remember (yourself) the old days when you knew it all.  Right?  It may not have been so long ago.  I just happen to be a middle aged lady that has lived a few more years than many of my day-to-day friends.  Ok, I'm the oldest in most of my circles.

How'd that happen?

I read the greatest post this weekend, it was a younger blogger's take on what she's learned in "30" years.  Whoop-dee-doo, kid!  Try almost 46 years!  Now that's a long time to learn some stuff!  I had to giggle at some of the things she's learned because….she's spot on, I've learned many of the same lessons.

Life, it's a school everyone must attend.

Forty-five Things:

— Learn to apologize, sincerely.



— Show affection, even when you're PMS'n.

— Learn to cook.  It makes lots of people happy.

— Read books, lots of them.  Every genre.  (I know, I'm book snobby)

— Only buy clothes that flatter.  Don't fall into trendy mistakes.

— Make friends, especially with someone you wouldn't normally talk to.

— Pray.  Outloud.  Every time you have the chance.

— Sing to your children, all the time.

— Celebrate special occasions.  Each one is a gift.

— Learn to drive a stick shift.  It will impress your son, someday.

— Go to the beauty parlor at least every other month.  Trim those scraggly ends.

— For goodness sake, WAX YOUR EYE BROWS!!

— Be patient with your hubby & kids.  They really do want to make you happy.

— Write thoughts and prayers down in a journal.

— Have a healthy sense of humor.

— Smile, a lot.

— Share what God gives you.  It really is better to give than to recieve.

— Be passionate about something and help someone else love it too.

— Send words of love to those who are far away.  Distance can't stop love.

— Watch movies with your family.  Make it special with treats & pj's.

— Own a dog.  Caring for an animal teaches a lot about unconditional love.

— Learn how to make eye contact and do it.

— Overdress.  Always.  Trust me on this one.

— Guard secrets.  No one keeps them, in case you haven't learned yet.

— Speak kindly about others.  It will always come back on you if you don't.

— Keep in contact with college girlfriends.  Forever.  It's fun growing old.

— Tell your kids who you admire and why.

— Use a 3-way mirror.  Really, look at your backside before you leave home.

— Learn how to wear make-up.  Look classy when you go out.

— Wear cute boots & scarves.

— Take fun trips with your hubby (alone).

— Splurge & buy something really special for yourself.  Especially on your Bday.

— Go to the beach every time you get the chance.  You may move far away.

— Cheer for your hubby's favorite teams.

— Buy good sheets!

— Brush your teeth and floss 3 x's a day.  Just do it.

— Change your hair color.  Wear it like a bosslady!

— Be known as an encourager.

— Save your money.  It disappears before your eyes & you will need it!

— Go to college.  Do it.  Don't think you'll go back.  You won't.

— Marry for love, not money.

— Open your heart to Jesus.  He will change your life like no one else.

— Love people.  Really love them.  They'll know if you don't.


I know I'm not the wisest gal in the world.  But this list represents much of what I do know.  My wish is that somehow along this path of livin'…I've passed the good stuff on to my children.  Don't wait to make your own list.  Write down what you know and smile at the life lesson's God has sent your way!