Posts Tagged ‘love others’

Grace Hoarder

Wednesday, April 4th, 2018

Confession: I withhold grace from people I love.

I’ve always known this about myself and I’ve worked on being better a million times but yesterday as I walking to the mailbox, I felt God whisper to me my inability to extend grace. At first, I wondered where that thought came from then….I realized God was nudging me, reminding me to snap out of it.

So much has happened this year. I’ve had time to reflect on my life and how I’ve lived it. Maybe more than I really needed. Nothing is wasted with God so, I’ll take all of the looking back as a lesson in becoming better.

My children experienced my graceless mothering over the years and I know they love me and even forgive me…but, I can see how that has crippled much of my relationship with them. They feel as if they can’t please me and I blame it on my wielding the sword of perfectionism over them. Each of them are beautiful, unique and wonderful people. I’ve always known it and I’ll always believe it. It’s me that pushed too hard, blazed over them when they made mistakes and left them hurting by my angry silence.

That grace, the holding it so tightly….hurts everyone.

My kids are all grown and gone but I can see the effects of my grace hoarding in their lives. I can tell that they handle me with caution. I don’t think they do it to hurt me but I know it is just a consequence of my own doing. I grew up with a mom who couldn’t give grace. There was no moment in my life where she said, “Hey, that’s okay!” “Don’t worry about it!”. She was the opposite. She lauded her fury over me, beat me down physically & spiritually. I never received the grace I needed from her.

No one has ever been given more grace (BY GOD) than me. He has gone over-board loving me fully and unconditionally. My life, many times has been like a trainwreck! Still, G R A C E was plentiful and even sweet over my foolishness.

Why? Why have I lived hoarding my own grace?

I can’t answer. I won’t blame. I’ll just make it my priority to offer it out every chance I get.

Grace for you.
Grace for me.
Grace for everyone.
Amen.

Am I Generous?

Friday, June 16th, 2017

gener 1

Many long years ago when my hubby was about to graduate from Bible college, a friend of a friend gave our family a generous gift of $500. Back then, money was tight. Seminary families are not living the high life if you’ve ever been curious. Matter of fact, to us…that $500 was more like $5000 to us in today’s money. It was a huge blessing and we were blown away by his generosity. He had no reason to gift us that money but he did and it taught me a huge lesson in generosity.

Give…. even if it costs you something.

For most of our married life we’ve been on a strict budget with our money. That’s probably normal for most folks living out the American dream. Still, we’ve tried to be generous with what God has given us. You’ve probably heard of or been the recipient by now of someone PAYING IT FORWARD. One of my daughter’s has this gift and loves to pay it forward every chance she gets. It’s a wonderful way to love on someone and show generosity for no reason at all other than your heart is over-flowing with kindness for those outside of yourself.

Being generous doesn’t always involve paying for someone’s coffee or hamburger in a drive-thru. We can be generous with our time, words, actions, attitudes and more.

gener 2

God reminded me this morning to be more generous in how I love the people He has put in my life. I pondered over it for a few minutes and came to the conclusion that I could use to be a little more giving when it comes to loving people. It’s easy to say you love someone when all is right in the relationship….but when you feel slighted or overhear a snarky comment it can be a challenge. Still, God expects us to love on in spite of how the other folks behave. Always. It’s important to remember to be a generous FORGIVER!

A good lesson for me who loves to love with abandon.

The truth of the matter is this — life is tough. Don’t make it harder on yourself or others when you can be a cushion of generosity. Love when it stings a little, give when it costs ya and spread generosity around like you’re a millionaire!

gener 3

Now go on, be generous! Give it all away!